HollywoodIdiocy.com

The Peacock network is relying on a defective detective to prop up its summer ratings; USA Network’s obsessive-compulsive detective, Monk, played by Tony Shaloub, will move from USA to NBC for its seventh season, scheduled to start in July.

The one-hour dramady, which has flourished on USA, has been airing reruns on NBC along with its companion show, Psych, for about a month and doing decent numbers. The move from USA to NBC for the summer half of Monk’s season is a big show of faith by the NBC parent network in the show, which has also done well in DVD complete season sales.

There is, of course, a risk that the show could do poorly and fade from memory as a result, although it is more likely that the show would just move back to cable netlet USA if it doesn’t perform well on the broadcast net.

So far, there is no word on whether the new, third season of Psych will join Monk in the NBC jump, or if it will remain on USA. Keep in mind, SAG and AFTRA continue to hold the looming threat of a possible actors strike, which could begin as early as June, could shut production back down in Hollywood on these and all other shows.

Tina Fey and Amy Poehler’s pregnancy-buddy pic, Baby Mama, grabbed the golden binky, topping the weekend box office competition with an $18.2 million haul. Modern “Cheech and Chong” flick, “Harold and Kumar Escape Guantanamo Bay,” took second with a still-respectable $14.5 million.

Last week’s champs, The Forbidden Kingdom and Forgetting Sarah Marshall, slipped to third and fourth place, respectively, but still took in around $11 million each. Nim’s Island marked the big drop-off, however, taking in just over $4 million and taking the fifth spot.

Overall, box office was depressed for the weekend and may be reflective of the style of pictures typically released in April. The summer blockbuster season starts next weekend with the release of Paramount/Marvel’s Iron Man, which is expected to do huge numbers.

In fact, every weekend in May has a huge anticipated blockbuster releasing; following Iron Man will be the live-action Speed Racer, followed by the Chronicles of Narnia follow-up, Prince Caspian, rounds out with Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, which marks four top blockbusters in the first four weeks of May, although the final weekend of May could be flat in terms of new films, since the biggest scheduled release is the Sex and the City movie, for which expectations are much lower, and is seen as counter-scheduling to the action-heavy, male demographic films like Iron Man, Speed Racer and Indiana Jones.

Expect this to be the last quiet weekend for at least the next four weeks; the box office blitz is about to begin in a big way, and you’ll want to keep your Alli close and your enemies closer.

Actress Sandra Bullock and her husband emerged unharmed after a car crash late Friday night. Bullock and her husband, Jesse James, were passengers in an SUV when a car driven by Lucille Gatchell crossed the center line, striking their vehicle.

Gatchell, 64, of Gloucester, MA, blew a 0.20 on an alcohol breath test following the accident, according to police reports, almost three times the legal limit. Both vehicles were totalled, but no one in either vehicle was hurt, thankfully. Both vehicles were reported to be traveling about 15-20 MPH at the time of the crash, which probably contributed to the lack of injuries.

Bullock is in Massachusetts making a new romantic comedy, The Proposal. As for the accident, it is generally believed that the failed movie 28 Days did more damage to her, but it’s unlikely Gatchell will be able to get a reasonable life insurance quote any time soon.

President George W. Bush will make a surprise appearance on NBC’s Howie Mandel-hosted game show, Deal or No Deal, to wish contestant Captain Joseph Kobes well in his quest to win the game show and thank him for his service to his country. Capt. Kobes has served in Iraq for three tours of duty and has won both the Purple Heart and a Bronze Star, two of the highest honors given by the US government.

Bush’s message was taped at the White House and is an appropriate honor for a serviceman who has given so much for his country during a time of war. While NBC did not reveal whether Captain Kobes fared well in his quest for as much as $1 million, you can bet his elation at a message from his commander in chief did not elicit a taciturn response and would have set off motion sensor lights when he saw it.

Raking in more than $20.8 million this weekend, the martial arts movie The Forbidden Kingdom bested all comers to take the top spot at the box office. The action flick eked out a victory over the Judd Apatow comedy, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, which came in at a still-nice $17.3 million in its intial debut to take second place.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall cost approximately twice that to make, so the film is expected to recover its budget at the box office, which means the studio won’t be making their budget software work overtime to help the flick break even; the breakup comedy stars How I Met Your Mother co-star Jason Segel as the victim of a breakup. His unrequited love is played ably by Veronic Mars and Heroes actress Kristen Bell, while Segal’s rebound girl is played by former That 70s Show and Family Guy star, Mila Kunis.

Both films pushed the Prom Night remake back to third place, where it posted a respectable week two draw of $9.1 million. The Al Pacino thriller 88 Minutes came in a distant fourth at $6.8 million which probably doesn’t even cost Pacino’s retainer to appear in the film, let alone his full salary.

The self-important George Clooney saw his Leatherheads farce drop to 10th place in its third week of release, and still hasn’t made even half of its $58 million budget back.

Without Britney Spears and Sarah Chalke to pump up the ratings, CBS’ comedy-on-life-support drew only a 3.4 Nielsen this week in an episode with no guest stars for How I Met Your Mother. Still, the show did build on the ratings lead-in from Big Bang Theory, which drew a 2.9.

While those numbers are on Orovo diets compared to what was considered great ratings 20 years ago, the improvment HIMYM is showing off its lead-in may be just enough to show that the show does not require guest stars every week, and that it has enough oomph to build in the ratings bar set by its lead-in.

A brief prayer wouldn’t hurt, but signs are good that HIMYM’s demise might have been diagnosed a bit prematurely. Like, say, by Dr. Elliot of a certain NBC comedy soon destined to appear on ABC, perhaps?

Ask the average Screen Actors Guild media relations guy if SAG wants to strike so soon after the extended writers strike that lost Hollywood billions, and they’ll assure you that of course they don’t want to create another work stoppage in the city of Guilded Implants.

But ask them about their expectations for the next SAG contract and their double-speak is about as convoluted as that of a truck accident lawyer. SAG is demanding to get what neither directors nor writers could manage: a better cut of DVD sales. Furthormore, they want even more than the AMPTP was willing to give writers and actors in terms of new media residuals.

SAG and AFTRA (who will negotiate separately for the first time in 27 years) naturally think they’re the most deserving because actors are out-front, the faces and bodies that sell movies. Never mind that the actors are already far more well-compensated on average than any director or writer will ever be.

Sure, folks like Tom Hanks will claim the battle isn’t for them, but for the casting session rejects who rarely get work. So… if they rarely get work… how is it that better DVD and new media residuals will help those folks again? No, this is all about turning $20 million per flick actors into $30 million per flick headliners.

The Riedel-sipping Elton John spent the weekend shilling for Sen. Hilllary Rodham and took the occassion to Reagan-bash, even though the Gipper’s been in the ground for at least a couple years now, and out of power for 20 years.

John’s complaint, of course, was the old saw about how Reagan “did nothing” about AIDS. Yawn. The last time EJ’s been relevent in his political commentary is also about as long ago as the last time the Brit pop tart had a solid hit record.

Like Striesand, Manilow and countless other no longer relevant liberals, they tell you exactly how they feel about everything … so long as it’s 20 years after the fact and the person they’re hating on is no longer alive to defend himself.

Courage.

Let’s face it. I grew up in the 1980s when the original Prom Night came out, and it was no big whoop, even back then. So it’s a bit surprising that the 2008 remake is such a hit, despite being no better than its 1980s-era original.

The Prom Night franchise is perhaps best remembered for its second installment, which landed a cameo by Jamie Lee Curtis, then hot off her Halloween debut and the then-reigning “queen of scream.”

Now, getting chased around my a knife wielding maniac is standard fare for starlets looking to establish themselves, stumbling down the same path Curtis blazed about 25 years ago. Brittany Snow is the victim in training this time out, and she proves herself servicable if a bit generic.

The flick made its $20 million budget back in the first weekend, though, so expect sequels to follow. Meanwhile, Street Kings did far worse, raking in over $12 million to rank a distant second place; Street Kings also cost $20 million to make, but is less likely to make it back. The moribund Leatherheads dropped to fifth place, narrowly edging out the ever-popular Dr. Seuss film, Horton Hears A Who.

The worst major debut was Miramax’s Smart People, which struggled to reach $4 million and rank seventh. Box office is still in the pre-summer flick slumber; expect things to pick up in May.

While actors plot a way to look like they are threatening to strike mere months after the WGA sent Hollywood back to work by wrapping up their 100-day strike… without actually going on strike… moviegoers seemed a bit disinterested last weekend as 21 maintained the top box office spot with a mere $15.3 million weekend.

All three new movies - Nim’s Island, Leatherheads and The Ruins - fell well short of expectations, taking in $13.2 million, $12.3 million and $8.0 million respectively and ranking second, third and fifth with those takes. Horton Hears A Who raked in another $9.1 million to bring their four-week take to $131 million. Big-screen bomb 10,000 B.C. dropped to 10th place after five weeks and has taken in only $89 million in that time, including around $2 million last weekend, well short of its $105 million production budget, meaning the film won’t break even domestically and will rely on foreign markets and DVD sales to reach black ink.

Of course, the real summer movie rush isn’t quite here yet; that doesn’t kick off until May 2, when Marvel and Paramount’s Iron Man debuts. Until then, the weekend box office isn’t likely to be dominated for very long, but continue to be in the realm of fractional ownership.

Charlton Heston, the actor that at least three generations of moviegoers associate with as the voice and face of the Biblical figure Moses, passed away this past weekend at the age of 84. In addition to his role in The Ten Commandments, Heston will be remembered for his roles in other Biblical epics like The Greatest Story Ever Told and Ben Hur.

Heston also spent a lot of time in science fiction films, most notably in the Planet of the Apes movies of the 1970s, as well as Soylent Green and The Omega Man. In his later years, he became politically active as one of the few “out of the cloest” political conservatives in liberal Hollywood.

While active in the National Rifle Association and serving as president of that organization for a time, Heston made famous the line that “they” could take is gun, “when they pry it from my cold, dead fingers.” Gun enthusiasts, Bible film enthusiasts and political conservatives will feel the loss most sharply as they are the most likely to memorialize Heston as the wallpaper image on their LCD mount.

One of Heston’s best-known screen appearances in his later years came in the SNL film, Wayne’s World. When Wayne and Garth stop at a gas station to ask directions to find a church, a feeble old man hesitatingly starts stumbling through his lines; suddenly, Mike Myers breaks character and asks if “we can get a better actor.” The old man is hustled away and Heston steps in, delivering the same lines with such emotion that it leaves Wayne and Garth in tears.

It was a movie moment that paid tribute to Heston’s acting ability even after he became outspoken on his conservatism and was officially “on the outs” with Hollywood.